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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23083255">Troubleshooting Space Divas</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/annamwrites/pseuds/annamwrites'>annamwrites</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Mass Effect - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Fluff and Humor, Humor</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 11:13:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,583</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23083255</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/annamwrites/pseuds/annamwrites</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Shepard and Lawson go on a shopping date and somehow still find trouble to shoot at.</p><p>A short story for Spectre Requisitions 2020.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Miranda Lawson/Female Shepard</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Spectre Requisitions 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Troubleshooting Space Divas</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Junker/gifts">Junker</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I hope you enjoy this little story!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Alright, Lawson, here's the plan." Shepard paused as gunshots sounded off in the distance, an eyebrow corked up as though she was irritated at the crooks for daring to interrupt her. "I come from the left as a distraction; you ambush them from behind and throw them in a Stasis." Shepard reached into her rugged leather jacket and conjured a sidearm.</p><p>It was Miranda's turn to raise an eyebrow.</p><p>"You're carrying?"</p><p>"You mean you're not?"</p><p>"Shepard, we were shopping."</p><p>"Force of habit." Shepard slid a heatsink in, gazing lovingly at her trusty sidearm. A roll of Miranda's sky blue eyes made Shepard defensive. "Well, we did end up needing it, didn't we?"</p><p>"Whatever. Let's take those bastards down so we can get back to it, shall we?"</p><p>"On my count, Lawson. One--"</p><p>"You do remember you're not my Commander anymore, right?" Miranda pointed out as she brought up her biotic corona. A bright blue glow enveloped the woman and Shepard felt the all-too familiar tingle run across her skin.</p><p>"Sorry, babe," she mouthed, rising to her feet. "Force--"</p><p>"Force of habit, I know." Miranda butted in with a desperate sigh. Another chorus of gunshots; this time accompanied by the telltale sound of shattering glass. "Come on. Let's round them up before they demolish the place."</p><p>"Alright. One, two, three!"</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>2 HOURS EARLIER</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>The Silversun Strip was bustling with life as usual. The slow pacing and untroubled window-shopping by passersby may have once annoyed Shepard, who always had a pressing matter to attend to or deadline to meet--but now, the retired Alliance officer had all the time in the world to idly trot around like all the other civilians.</p><p>Retirement was surprisingly underwhelming, if she was honest.</p><p>Shepard wasn't used to having heaps of free time in her hands; she also wasn't used to spending that free time shopping or watching movies instead of maintaining armor and weaponry, training at the shooting range or sparring with crewmates.</p><p>Not that she couldn't still do those things--but it's different when your job performance depends on it, she reckoned.  And for a long, long time, her job was her whole life. </p><p>Retirement forced Shepard to find other reasons to wake up in the morning.</p><p>Thankfully, her number one reason was standing right beside her, staring thoughtfully at the window of a home improvement store.</p><p>"What is it, Miri?" Shepard asked, throwing an arm around Miranda's shoulders.</p><p>"Weren't we talking about doing a small renovation the other day?" </p><p>Indeed they were. Miranda moved in with Shepard shortly after the war, yet in the two years they lived together they hadn't changed or added a single thing in the apartment besides their personal items. It was high time they decorated their shared home to reflect their personalities and needs.</p><p>"You're right." Shepard simply said, taking Miranda  by the hand and leading her into the store.</p><p>In reality, retired life wasn't that bad. Shepard now had the time to read, cook, go on trips, pursue hobbies she'd never tried before and generally enjoy the finer things in life. After all, she deserved it, didn't she? She'd done her part for the galaxy--multiple times, in fact. She had seen her fair share of death and had been the target of one too many murder attempts--hell, one of them had even been successful.</p><p>Most of all she was glad that she was able to spend her newfound excess of time with Miranda Lawson. Domestic life had been a foreign concept for the both of them and while it didn't come without disagreements, the love and respect they had for each other surpassed everything else.</p><p><em>"Shepard and Lawson? The dictionary has their picture under the definition of 'power couple',"</em> Joker had quipped when he learned of their relationship.</p><p>He wasn't wrong.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>1 ½ HOUR LATER</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>The two women exited the store with three thousand credits less to their name. Planting a kiss on Shepard's cheek, Miranda took her lover by the arm and flashed her a wide smile. </p><p>"I'm really looking forward to redecorating," Miranda admitted, her eyes glistening like a kid's that was promised a new toy. "It's been years since I last had a place to call my own, or the freedom to design it to my desire." </p><p>"The last time I had a room I was allowed to decorate, I was a teenager," Shepard mused. "I covered my walls with posters from old Earth emo bands."</p><p>"I hope you're not planning on recreating it," Miranda teased, elbowing Shepard in the rib.</p><p>"Perhaps I should," Shepard joked back. "A <em>My Chemical Romance</em> poster could really tie the master bedroom together…"</p><p>They took a walk down the strip, window-shopping and chatting about everything from interior décor ideas to the new Blasto movie, before they decided to try a new restaurant a few blocks away.</p><p>The women were making their way down a quiet street when they heard the first gunshot. Instinctively, Shepard pulled Miranda to the side of the road, their backs against a wall. </p><p>"Was that what I think it was?" Shepard muttered, ignoring the eyeroll Miranda directed at her.</p><p>"If you think it was a gunshot, I'd say yes," Miranda replied, flicking a strand of ink black hair behind her ear.</p><p>Three more gunshots rumbled in the distance, as if to assure them.</p><p>"Could it be C-Sec?" Miranda tried.</p><p>"I'm not sure. We'd hear sirens, wouldn't we?" Shepard shrugged. "We have to check it out."</p><p>Holding hands, Shepard and Miranda rushed towards the direction of the noise. The ruckus took place in an open parking lot right around the corner. They took cover behind a parked skytruck as Shepard peeked out carefully.</p><p>Shouting and swearing echoed throughout the parking lot, then a couple more shots. Shepard glanced back at her girlfriend.</p><p>"Yeah, looks like small time crooks," she concluded quietly. "Four, maybe five of them. Their weapons are dated as hell."</p><p>Miranda brought up her omnitool. "I'm calling C-Sec." </p><p>A loud metallic bang suggested that one of the skycars in the parking lot had found its tragic end.</p><p>"Are you suggesting that we just sit still and let them bring down the neighborhood?" Shepard furrowed her brow in disbelief.</p><p>Miranda pursed her scarlet painted lips as she pondered Shepard's tone.</p><p>"Are you suggesting that we apprehend them ourselves?" </p><p>Shepard nodded. "Sort of. We incapacitate them so they don't make any more damage, then we call C-Sec to collect them."</p><p>An ominous and exceptionally descriptive threat was yelled out from the parking lot. Miranda grimaced at the mental image. </p><p>"Okay. Let's do it." </p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>NOW</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>"I suggest you all lower your guns," Shepard shouted as she appeared into the parking lot, "or whatever those ancient pieces of metal are supposed to be."</p><p>The crooks--turned out there were five, while a sixth one laid dead in the sunken windshield of an unlucky skycar--all turned to look at the stranger, completely dumbfounded.</p><p>"Beat it lady," a turian growled, mandibles flaring. "You have no business here."</p><p>"My business is where I say it is," Shepard disagreed with a sly smile as she revealed her own weapon. </p><p>The crooks all aimed their guns at her, but Miranda was faster. The stasis field swallowed them up, immobilizing the five men and keeping them floating meters off the ground.</p><p>"I kind of wish you would've let them try to take a shot," Shepard called out to her girlfriend.</p><p>"Sorry, babe, playtime's over," came the coy reply.</p><p>With a frustrated sigh, Shepard activated her omnitool and dialled C-Sec's emergency line. </p><p>"ETA's five minutes," she informed Miranda once she hung up. "You think you can handle it?" She gestured towards the stasis field hovering above them like a gigantic helium balloon.</p><p>"Would you like to bet on it?" Miranda returned, not taking the bait. </p><p>"I think I'll pass," Shepard laughed.</p><p>Soon enough blaring sirens approached. Three C-Sec skycars and an ambulance came to a halt in the parking lot. Miranda dropped the stasis field and the criminals were apprehended, while another officer took Shepard's statement.</p><p>"So, you are the one who called the incident in?" He asked, his omnitool glowing across his forearm.</p><p>"Yes, sir."</p><p>"May I take your details, please?"</p><p>Shepard waved a hand affirmatively. The officer scanned her over with his omnitool. Then his jaw dropped.</p><p>"You're… not Commander Shepard, are you?" He exclaimed starry-eyed.</p><p>"I'm retired now," Shepard replied casually. </p><p>The turian who spoke to her earlier turned back to take a good look before he was shoved into the backseat of a cop car. </p><p>"You didn't stand a chance, buddy," the officer handling him told him with a laugh as he closed the door.</p><p>"Officer, we won't need to join you at the station, will we?" Shepard asked the man who took her statement.</p><p>"No, I believe we're covered," the officer answered. "You ladies are free to enjoy your evening. Thank you for your help--and for your service, Commander." </p><p>"Thank you, sir." </p><p>As the skycars lifted off, Shepard turned to face Miranda.</p><p>"The troubleshooting space divas strike again," Miranda declared with a smirk.</p><p>"So… you're not mad at me for interrupting our date?"</p><p>Miranda giggled. "How could I? I actually had fun. Maybe we should hit the Armax Arsenal Arena next. I have some leftover energy I need to use up..."</p><p>"Perhaps we should head home rather than the Arena, then?" Shepard suggested with a wink.</p><p>Miranda pulled Shepard in for a kiss before both of them broke into laughter.</p>
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